The Smallest Act of Caring?

“Too often we underestimate the power of a touch, a smile, a kind word, a listening ear, an honest compliment, or the smallest act of caring, all of which have the potential to turn a life around.”  
~ Leo Buscaglia

     Tonight, I was exhausted...mentally, physically, emotionally...completely and totally exhausted. It had been a good day. My students were well-behaved! My desk is organized again! I came home to an installed dishwasher...and a hot supper on the table! When you're a full-time teacher who has recently learned to be a full-time mom AND teacher...you can't have a day much better than that! Still, I was exhausted...partly due to this wonderful "back to school" cold all my students have shared with me...and partly because we have court tomorrow.

      Court is a simple foster care review. It's common place. It's not common place for me, though...because I've never had done before tomorrow! Tomorrow, we will go to court and the kids' workers will say, "Yes they're doing well in their current home, and they should remain there." That's that for four more months. The process isn't exactly that simple...there are things that could interfere with that or change it, but you get the point. For me, it's emotionally nerve-wracking and draining! I'm one of those people who hates change and hates the fear of the unknown. I despise it, actually. I'm aware that my God is greater than me...and that it isn't unknown to HIM, but that isn't always enough reassurance. You see...these children, whose current goal is "return to mom," they've stolen my heart. I know you aren't supposed to get attached...but, honestly, I can't help but wonder what kind of a foster parent you are, if you DON'T get attached...no judgment...just an observation. So, even though I KNOW "my kids" will be going home some day...9 times out of 10...I'm not ready for it, and in my heart and head is a fear they MAY say, "These kids are going home tomorrow!" So...despite the simplistic nature of what tomorrow holds, it's been worrying me sick for three weeks now.

      I say all that to explain why I'm "exhausted" despite a great day!

      Homework had been completed. Little Man had read an entire book to me...and made a 100 on the questions I asked him about the book. Baby Girl had brushed he hair all by herself and only missed one small patch of tangles (is it sad that this made me teary-eyed and slightly melancholy? We've been striving to help them grow up...but soon, she won't NEED me to fix her hair before school. Sigh...) I had chased Dixie down, then taken her for a ride, because Baby Girl slipped the leash off too soon. Lots of fun had been had in the Bloomer household!

      Tonight, we were just spent. We told the kids, "Prayers down here; you tuck yourselves into bed." This didn't go over very well Little Man (the older of the two kids) started pouting....but he prayed, and he went upstairs. Well, he went upstairs for about 30 seconds. Then, he was lurking on the stairs, not in his bed.

      "What are you doing on the stairs, playing with the cat?" Jeremy asked him.

      "I can't sleep!" he whined.

      "You can't sleep? You didn't even go all the way upstairs. You haven't tried to sleep!" I laughed.

       "I can't sleep if you don't tuck me in, though. I really can't." he pleaded.

       "Let me finish what I'm working on down here. You go to bed. I'll come check on you in five minutes. I promise." (I really didn't want to trudge up those stairs, but there's just something about those sweet brown eyes....it's not like he was asking for something bad.)

        Seven minutes later, I slowly climbed the stairs. Slowly. I was sure they would both be asleep by then. I was wrong. Little Man still had his LIGHT shining brightly!! He looks at me impishly and says, "You're late."

         Laughing, I walk to his bed. "Why are you still awake? Why is your light on still?"

         "I was waiting for you! I can't sleep unless you or Jeremy tucks me in anymore." at this, he snuggles deep within the covers, waiting for me to tuck them in around him. I gently kiss his forehead, as he says, "If I go back home to  my mom, I'm making her tuck me in every single night, just like you do. I'm going to make her. She  may not have done it before, but I sleep better when you tuck me in at night. So, I'm going to make my mom do it, too, if I go back home."

         As, I left to tuck Baby Girl in, he whispered, "I love you, Dayna. Good night." He was asleep before I got to the bottom of the stairs.

        It's unbelievable. Can that one small act of caring...that touch...that kiss on the forehead...really make such a difference in the life of that little boy? Is he really able to sleep that much better, all because we tucked him into bed? Are our bedtime "touches," our seemingly small, simple acts of caring, turning his life around? Will he remember them when he's gone? Will he carry those memories with him, for a lifetime? When he's grown and has children of his own...will he remember how important those "tuck ins" were to him? Will he pray with his kids and kiss them gently? Will he tickle them and laugh with them just before sleep sneaks in, like we do with him? I choose to believe he will...and that right there, the potential to turn his life around...that is why we do foster care.